I just wish my body would do what it’s supposed to do for once. I feel like my reproductive organs are yelling at me,

“You can’t make me! I’m not going to cooperate! F.uck you!”

I talked to my RE yesterday, and my hormone levels came back right on target, and yet I bleed. There’s no reason for the bleeding other than to piss me off.  So, I started progesterone last night. I know how this will go- I’ll continue to bleed until it tapers to spotting for the rest of the 10 days of medication, and then I’ll get a “real” bleed from the progesterone. 3 weeks after this all started it will finally end, and I’ll single handedly have saved the tampon industry from collapse.

Why is it so fu.cking hard? Millions of women have regular-ish cycles, ovulate, get pregnant without the assistance of a dildo cam, enough syringes to make an addict drool,  and a village of medical staff. They seamlessly move on to birth babies (after announcing their pregnancies at week 4). They don’t have ovarian failure, they don’t spontaneously abort their embryos or fetuses. They just have sex, get pregnant, and have a baby.  I feel like I’m not asking for much, just what most everyone else around me has.

A few months ago I though I was doing so much better, gaining perspective, and feeling hopeful. Today, not so much.